Wednesday, May 4, 2011

an inspiring and powerful read...


This morning I read a blog post from the fabulous Sherry at Indigo Girl which wowed me to no end.  It was titled Six Years In a Life of Living.  I think everyone should read this - it's inspiring and powerful.  With Sherry's permission I am posting it here:

A year ago today I stopped blogging at Everyday Possibilities because I had reached the milestone of 5 years on my breast cancer journey and I was ready to get out and live my life. I had been living it but I needed to feel a reconnection to other aspects of life. And it was good.


And now here I sit, six years to the day when a very large steel door was slammed in my face as I heard the words "we believe that you have breast cancer." I remember that I had stopped breathing. My skin went clammy. My vision blurred. I knew what it felt like to be paralyzed...by fear. Cancer. It might as well have been shouted like this  CANCER

I think I went deaf for a time. I heard words being spoken to me about another mammogram and calcification but I was so numb that I didn't take everything in all at once. I heard the tone of my doctor's voice and her concern and I heard a voice inside me saying "you know this is true". I never doubted it for a moment and I never gave myself any false sense of it being "nothing". I've always been in tune with my body and I pay attention to the messages it gives me.


But that was then. It was NOT a lot of fun, it was NOT all a piece of cake. It was not something I treated with a cavalier attitude. It was NOT something I look back on and say "well, that's done now, what's next?". I do NOT live in the bubble that because I have done all the necessary work that cancer and I will never meet again. There is no cure for this disease. There is always the possibility that it will return. Make no mistake. It is a very formidable opponent but it too has fears. It fears being in the light. It fears being attacked. It fears strength and courage and faith and spirit. It fears hope. It fears people who keep the word cancer small like I did and never refer to it as the Big "C" or give it any importance.


I learned so much and continue to learn as I grow. I decided that my life began again the day I had that mammogram and that it was up to me to live it and live it well. Yes, a very large door slammed in my face that May 4th, but I learned that there are always possibilities. That there are ways around a door like that. I learned that I don't always have to do it by myself. That other people are willing and happy to help to open that door or carve a new one. I learned to be grateful in so many ways on so many levels.

 Dark, bad, frightening things happen in everyone's life. This one is just my story and one event in my life that was part of my journey. But the things that I learned apply to all of us. Smile. Be kind. Think of happy thoughts. Listen to what others have to say and really listen. Love yourself. Don't demean yourself. Find your passion. Life your dream. If you can go the extra mile for someone else, do that...someday it will be your turn. Accept. And that means pain, discomfort, sorrow, fear, challenge and help and love and kindness from others. Accept that we will all leave this earth...and accept that you have a responsibility to live the life you were meant to live.

I'll celebrate today and tonight and I'll give thanks for hundreds of people and hundreds of things and hundreds of experiences. Each day is that special gift we get. I open my eyes and I smile each morning and I thank God for this day -- for another page to add to my book of life. I no longer "live" in the past or think about how I "was" in the past. I think of today and how I am, and tomorrow and how I hope that I will be. I live with grace and joy and I'm humble that I have been given this opportunity to be in these precious moments of my life.
 
Thank you so much Sherry for allowing me to repost this!
 
Have a beautiful day, everyone!
xxoo

6 comments:

Adrienne said...

Beautifully articulated.
Thank you for posting.

Splenderosa said...

Yes, you are absolutely

right!

Sherry Smyth said...

Cathi, thank you so much for sharing my thoughts....spreading inspiration is the only way for it to grow. And if anyone learns anything from something I've experienced I feel joy.

Now the best thing is the word I need to type for verification. My post was about cancer and how bad things aren't the "end" and my word is: sucks. Yes, that's one of the best words to describe cancer!! Perfect!!!! :)

karen-holmes said...

Amen...

kimbirdy said...

beautiful and inspiring. thank you for posting her story here. a few years back i had a friend pass away from cancer. she was 25, a newlywed. during her last year, her family took her on a road trip around the country. she wanted desperately to see the world, but due to all the medical expenses, they could only explore the states. she loved every second of it. that was a powerful experience for me to witness. i knew i was likely going to keep living my life beyond what she could, and i was so inspired to live it well.

Lori said...

So glad you shared this Cathi ~ it was a powerful post indeed.

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